Funeral Flowers

Westminster Larger Catechism: Question 84.  Should all men die?
Answer: Death being threatened as the wages of sin, it has been appointed unto all men once to die; for that all have sinned.

A man asked one of my pastors if Presbyterians believed in funerals. He had been at Covenant for a few months, and had yet to hear us mention a death or funeral. With this void, he assumed that Presbyterians had a faux pas about death, and simply ignored the subject matter.
If that man would have waited a month, he would have heard his answer.
"Pray for the Wierenga family as they mourn the loss of their daughter, Alaina."
"Pray for Sherri and Phil Brendenberg as they mourn the loss of their son, Kirk in their fifth month of pregnancy."
"Pray for Kevin, Eve, Megan and Collin as they mourn the loss of their son and brother, Aidan."
Three funerals. Six weeks. All children.

With the first death, I cried uncontrollably. I called friends for advice on insignificant details on the death announcement as to avoid actually thinking about two week old Alaina's death. I spent 4 hours picking out the right flower arrangement for the funeral, settling on a bouquet of lilies.
By the second, I grew calloused. I bought 5 kinds of gray card stock for the memorial service. I sent flowers to the couple's home, vibrant yellow and orange ones, fitting what I knew of their design aesthetic.
By the third, I simply asked questions. I grew weary. I knew not what to say. I order an arrangement of white flowers.

I went to Aidan's funeral. I may not have known him, but I knew that being present for my church body was important. I sat in the back, with my purse full of tissues. I accepted the closure that the funeral brought and moved on.

Shortly after Aidan's funeral, Ryan started coming by the church office to play the piano. Ryan was undergoing chemo treatments for cancer. The pain was so intense that he had left his job. On his good days, he stop by to practice his favorite piano pieces. Some weeks, I'd see him every afternoon. Other weeks, his absence would be noticeable. Near the end of December, he sent me a playlist of his favorite piano pieces. It took me several weeks to get around to playing it, but when I returned to Chicago from Christmas, I was excited to share with my him my favorites, to ask him to play me "A Song of Simplicity" by Elijah Boseenbroek.

I returned to the announcement of his death. In my absence, he had moved home into hospice care and soon died. I sent the family a plant.

Westminster Shorter Catechism: Question 37.What benefits do men receive from Christ at death?
Answer: The souls of believers are at their death made perfect in holiness and do immediately pass into glory; and their bodies, being still united in Christ, do rest in their graves, till the resurrection.